It’s a relatively recent phenomenon, but conceptually, it makes sense. Dads-to-be are about to go through some serious life changes, and marking the welcome of a new family member is just a nice thing to do.
In this guide, we’ll give you everything you need to know about baby showers for dads, whether you’re about to become a father for the first time or you’re a veteran of surviving with little or no sleep and more used to bottles of milk than brews.
Planning the Dad Do
Baby showers don’t plan themselves, so there are a couple of things you should keep in mind when putting one of these together. Spoiler: don’t worry, dads, you’re not going to be the one doing the nitty gritty.
These are some guidelines you may want to follow but don’t stress too much. You want to get together with those nearest to you to celebrate something amazing, not to stick to a rulebook.
Who Is the Planner/Host?
Tradition dictates that a baby shower should be planned by a close friend or relative (but not a super close family member, we’re talking cousin or uncle).
Of course, you don’t have to be strict about how this rule is followed. If you would prefer to ask your father-in-law, best friend or brother, that’s fine too. The core idea is to have someone other than the parents, but it’s not compulsory!
When to Host a Baby Shower
Most people will hold the shower approximately 4-6 weeks before the due date. This is the sweet spot, as the baby will be far enough along, but hopefully not close enough that it will coincide with a premature birth.
But some parents are increasingly opting to hold the baby shower after the delivery, just to make sure everything has gone well. And of course, the baby (or babies!) can also attend.
What About Themes and Games?
Again, this is up to you, but many people decide to set a theme for a baby shower. If you do decide to go for a theme, make it something that’s close to your heart and full of joy.
Also, make it easy for people to take part. If joining the party is going to cost a lot of money just because of the chosen theme, it may exclude or annoy some of your friends and family.
Here are some ideas:
The Diaper Game. Dads are notoriously getting a bad wrap for changing diapers. Maybe it’s time to get some practice in, making dads-to-be race their friends to change a diaper as quickly as possible.
Daddy Pub Quiz. Dads often don’t know a lot of things about childbirth, or children in general. Or that’s the stereotype, at least. Check whether dad is theoretically ready for his upcoming role by testing his knowledge.
The Diaper Raffle. Every diaper that is given as a present gets a raffle ticket. The more diapers, the more tickets. Have a few joke prizes in there to lighten the mood, but have one decent ‘big prize’ for a single winner. Dad’s will end up with a closet full of diapers!
No Rules, But Some Don’ts
We say ‘no’ to a prescriptive approach, but there are probably a few don’ts that you should try and stick to. These are not because of tradition or decorum, but simply to exude kindness and to not upset anyone:
Don’t include a gift registry/list on the invite. Instead, put it on a separate bit of paper, or just let guests ask you if there is one.
No compulsory gift giving, especially from those who cannot attend. Once the baby is born, sure, a gift may be suitable, but it should always be a choice. Remember, a baby shower is a party invitation, not simply a gift-giving exercise.
Thank you notes should not be forgotten, send them a couple of weeks after the dad baby shower. Yes, the stereotype is that men are not organised, so remember to send these!
Dadchelor Party Gift Ideas
When it comes to baby showers, it’s all about giving presents that will be useful for the joys (and tasks!) ahead. But you can also sprinkle in a little fun, just so it doesn’t feel all too mechanical.
Here are a few ideas to get you going:
Diaper Bag. Dads are going to need them. Certain brands are marketed primarily for dads and tend to be a little more backpack-y in nature, mimicking what many already use.
Baby Carrier. Dads tend to be the mules, for the most part. Getting a comfortable baby carrier will be greatly appreciated, with many products good for both long hikes and a quick stop at the shops.
Netflix, Hulu, Disney+. We tend to think parenthood is hectic and fast-paced. And don't worry, that'll happen. But it’s also full of ‘down time’, with films and TV series the perfect backdrop to feeding and rocking.
Remember the Point!
Ultimately, baby showers are about community, showing support, and being with the people you love most. Yes, if someone is able and willing to gift much-needed items for the baby, they’re welcome, but people should not feel obliged or excluded.
It’s also a fantastic option to learn from other parents, how to deal with the practical processes, but also to understand the emotional rollercoasters dads will also be on. Mums will obviously also need a dad’s support, and it’s worth preparing for this through advice and listening to other experiences.
Baby showers have been commercialised, are often placed in a pressure cooker, and many start becoming mum or dadzillas, just like how it’s gone with weddings. Instead, ditch your ego, remember the important things, and don't stress about creating the ‘perfect’ event. Being with your nearest and dearest is what it’s all about.